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Dog Plays Piano
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A man takes his puppy to a bar and is told in no uncertain terms to leave immediately. "But this isn't just any dog," the man says. "This dog can play the piano."
"Well, if he can play that piano, you both can stay, and I'll give you a drink on the house." The man sits the dog on the piano stool, and the dog starts playing -- ragtime, Mozart, Gershwin -- and the bartender and patrons love it. Suddenly a bigger dog runs in, grabs the small dog by the scruff of the neck, and drags him out.
"What the hell was that all about?" the bartender asks. "Oh, that's his mother," the man says. "She wants him to be a doctor."
As a dental hygienist, I had a family come in one day for cleanings. By the time I was ready for the father, he informed me I had a lot to live up to. His six-year-old daughter kept commenting that a "very smart lady" was cleaning their teeth today. The father said she kept going on about my intelligence until he finally had to ask what she was basing her opinion on. The little girl replied, I heard people in here call her the Dental High Genius. (Barbara Givens)
A man called his mother in Florida, "Mom, how are you?" The mother answered. "Not too good. "I've been very weak." The son said, "Why are you so weak?" She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days." The son said, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?"
"Because I don't want my mouth to be full of food if you should call." |
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